Dressed Up

Perhaps surprisingly, it did not take us very long to settle on wedding dress decisions. Lindsey bought her wedding dress a few months ago (on sale, as it happened to luck out).

Hello Kitty is very cute.

I bought mine on Tuesday. If you are in the innest inner circle, maybe you have seen them. (I’m sure you can confirm or deny Hello Kitty rumors.) The dresses are on the very short list of Things I Can’t Put on the Blog, so I can’t post pictures or say much else.

So, Lindsey never gets this question (maybe I’m wrong!), but I get it a lot. Are you going to wear a dress? And yes, yes I am. I’m hot good lookin’ in a dress.

Okay. Maybe I am a little dykey.

At Oggi's in Guangzhou, after "gay prom".

I heart men’s clothing. Actually, it took me kinda a long time to figure out that I’m gay, because I think guys are really attractive. It took me a while to realize that I want to be sexy like a man, not have sex with a man. And when I finally learned what “transgender” was, things became a lot clearer for me. No, I’m not trans, but it did take me a minute figure out also that while I want to dress like a man, I don’t want to be a man.

So, if I dress like a dude 90% of the time, love men’s clothes, and would rather spend $100 on Cole Haan shoes than makeup brushes, what’s the deal with wearing a dress at my wedding? It’s a lot of smaller reasons. I actually kind of like wearing dresses. Finally, after years and years of resenting them, I like it. Now, I get to choose when and if I wear a dress (and I rarely do). I like that I look good in a dress, and I will wear them for the right occasion. I like looking like I’m getting married. I also like proving to people that I can– I can wear a dress as good as you, I can walk in heels. (And I have some fierce looking legs when I wear heels, for the record.) I can be a woman and wear men’s clothing, and I can be butch and wear a dress. I feel more like I’m cross-dressing in a dress than I ever do in a tie, but I can work it queen, *snap*snap*snap.

I can’t do my makeup though; Lindsey does that for me.

For more stylish ‘mos, you can check out a few of the hip butch/dyke fashion sites on our fair internet:
The Sartorial Butch (who also just got married!)
Dapper Q
Dyke Republic‘s Fashion tab
Butch Style


Prairie Modern

We are walking a fine line, friends. Lindsey’s parents came to visit a couple weekends ago. Aside, from eating at Giordano’s (which I have not done since…?), the highlight of the visit was talking with her dad about who the new manager of the Cubs might be. It is a particularly fun subject for me to discuss, because I neither know enough nor care enough about the Cubs to get too emotionally invested.

Right, focus: wedding blog. Aside from all that, the highlight of the parents’ visit was a chat on wedding decorations. Lindsey’s mom is a things-finding savant, and is busy picking up items to use as table decorations. We had a good long chat about square glass vases + natural arrangements (herbs, flowers, rocks, tall grasses). Lindsey and I agree on very few things, aesthetics wise. Early- to mid- century modern (okay, everyone likes that right now), is one, as is an unironic love for the Midwest. Which means we’ll use our pretty glass box of a venue and its nice, standard turn-of-millennium minimalism as a canvas for… prairie modern. That is a fine line. We just have to keep it in Prairie Modern territory and out of Prairie Home.

I’m worried, but I kind of love it. Clean lines, organic arrangements, simple color scheme. This is good, right?

The White Cube

Main Floor of the Figge Art Museum

If you’re into art history, modern art, museumology, place/space studies, or works that create paradigm shifts in thinking, you might like this collection of essays by Brian O’Doherty: The White Cube.

If you’re into our wedding, you might like to know that after a few weeks of email tag and voicemails, we got everything squared away to rent the Figge as our wedding and reception venue. Now everything else we’re thinking of has a place to live. Yaaaay.

The visual possibilities in an art museum are interesting. The whole room is essentially a blank space, with a couple of large but generally innocuous installation pieces as punctuation. I’m counting on my theater design peeps to chip in with design ideas and solutions (nothing can be attached to, or basically touch, the walls). Who likes up-lighting!

All I Do is Win

If you’re going in…

What a Smart Monkey

We sent out our Save the Date emails in the past couple weeks. It was a thoroughly enjoyable experiment in HTML email campaigns. We used Mail Chimp, which was easy and has pretty nifty ways of tracking responses. Even awesomer, it’s free all the time, unless you send more than 3,000 emails a month to more than 500 people. In which case, you are more popular than me.

Classy, kids, that’s how we roll.

We’re deciding on a venue. While we ourselves have strong (often conflicting– who loves floral!) opinions in most designs matters, we don’t have a firm aesthetic vision for this wedding (“nice” is up there though). This means that the venue will pretty much determine the look of the ceremony and reception.

We have narrowed down the list to two. Okay, actually, these two were the only ones on the list to begin with. Still, there are deliberations. Rock and roll? White cube?

Option one: the River Music Experience. It’s a cool concert venue, the whole

Redstone Room at the RME

second floor is east to rent, there’s a separate room where it’d be easy to have the ceremony, they have awesome sound and video screens, it’s very mingling friendly, and they have neat stuff on display (like Jimmy Hendrix’s hat, and a scale replica of a riverboat!). Downsides is that the layout is weird, with a separate room, an odd-shaped open area, and then the concert room itself. Also, the rental contract is pretty relaxed and reasonable. They don’t have a lot staff, so we’d need to bring in more people to help.

Option two has been our first choice: the Figge Art Museum. It’s very modern

Figge Art Museum (New York Times Company)

Minimalist, all clean lines and spacious and open, has a view of the riverfront, an open patio, and you can rent access to all the galleries very reasonably. It would be a bit more expensive. Catering is entirely in-house, and it doesn’t have the AV equipment the River Music Experience has. It also has terrible sound, which vexes me. Glass walls, high ceilings, and terrazzo flooring is all quite echoey.

If we  get our act together, we should have it settled by next week. Lindsey has also been in full dress-finding mode. The excitement never ends here, let me tell you.


We’re fixing things up around here. There are new updates to the blog theme and some tweaks to the widget-y goodness along the right there. Any thoughts? I can move things around, tell me if something looks bad. There were also a few edits made to the About and 1 Mile March sections, in the header above. Real-content post is coming soon.