Monthly Archives: April 2010

One Iowa spotlight

One Iowa has reposted our first blog entry on their blog: “Rachel & Lindsey”.

For a love-fest you can always check out their “Our Stories” section.

All of which reminds me, dear hivemind:

  • Rec me some blogs for a blogroll (I have a list going already).
  • Rec me some companies, products, artists, what-have-you. I’m going to try to have a “recommends” post at least once a week.

Queer + wedding related is a bonus. Thanks everybody! And thanks, One Iowa.

Clippity clop! A follow-up to the color situation.

Lindsey was showing me a dress she bought at Target and we got onto the subject of colors again. I like to make fun of her for her earth tones, though it’s equally easy to make fun of someone who enjoys pairing orange shorts with yellow tank tops.

This anecdote references the cake anecdote I relayed in the previous post:
L: “You’re not allowed to design our wedding cake!”
R: “What! Why?”
L: “Just based on your previous cake experience.”
R: “Everyone loved that cake! I said the colors would be pink, orange, and yellow, and people were like what? but they loved it! Loved it.”
L: “Okay.”
R: “It looked amazing.”
L: “Really.”
R: “It looked like your pony t-shirt.”

This is Lindsey's pony t-shirt.

L: “Oh!” ::pause:: “Well now I kind of like that idea.”
R: “It could have lightning bolts.”
L: “Clippity clop! Clippity clop!”
R: “We should put it up on the blog for a vote.”
L: “No.”
R: “Yes.”

Please vote in the comments: Lindsey and Rachel should have a pony and or unicorn and or lightning bolt themed wedding cake, yes or no?

Pink, pink, and… pink.

I promise not everything on this blog is going to be boring stuff about equal rights and politics and religion and truth. Some of it will be important wedding stuff, like: colors.

Now, if you know Lindsey and I you may have noticed a certain difference in the types of colors we favor. One might be called, oh, say, “earth tone” and the other, more… “primary”. If you don’t know us, feel free to guess who is who. Here is a clue: When I (Rachel) was graduating from eighth grade, my sister let me pick the colors for the cake for our joint graduation party. I picked orange, yellow, and pink. It looked smashing.

Fortunately, we came to consensus on wedding colors fairly quickly. They are a spectrum of pinks, and gray:

Those aren’t exactly the shades of pink in play, but they’re close enough. We’re saying a fuschia, a medium pink, and a light pink, with a cloud gray.

There is still much debating room in how we employ these colors (particularly the fuschia). (Back me up here though, fuschia is an awesome color, yeah?) I’m terribly excited though because colors means we are one step closer to picking clothes.

As an aside, let me point you to this Wikipedia entry on pink, where you can learn how pink once referred to a yellow hue, and other interersting trivia.

Finally, because I do like the links, and because I know that you need to move on with your internetting, here’s a blog about color (ok, it’s about interior design, but it’s about color) that I like: Colour Me Happy.

The Catholics, lol.

This post is going to be a tangent on Catholicism, but first, an anecdote:

In the car: my mom (Catholic), my dad (Jewish, but quite familiar with Catholicism having been married 33 years), myself, and Lindsey
Dad: So have you thought about where you’re getting married?
Me: I don’t care very much particularly where the ceremony is. Lindsey wants to have it in a church.
Lindsey: I don’t think we’re going to find one though, so it doesn’t matter.
Me: There’s lots of congregationalists around though, I’m sure it’s fine. Or UUs, maybe Methodists…
Lindsey: If it’s not a Catholic church, I wouldn’t really bother.
Dad: Why wouldn’t you have it in a Catholic church?
Mom: O_o?

/anecdote Tangent on being Catholic right now:

This Easter was the first Easter in my life where I missed Easter Mass. And I missed Good Friday Mass, and Ash Wednesday Mass before that. And if you know us, you know we both love Ash Wednesday Mass.  Anyway, I missed Easter Mass for a variety of reasons, but mostly the Catholic Church hasn’t done much recently in the way of compelling faith.

I don’t so much mind most of the Church’s anti-woman, anti-gay, anti-individual, anti-freedom stances. I think there’s something to be said for inherently conservative tradition. It’s the Church actively working against the teachings of Christ that I can’t abide. So this week’s Newsweek tackles the role of women in Catholicism in light of the clergy’s current sexual abuse scandal. Obviously, the violation of children and the cover-up of decades of child abuse doesn’t exactly inspire a renewal of baptismal vows. The Newsweek article cursorily covers the role of nuns. Which leads me to recall this NYT article about nuns being investigated by the Vatican for doing too much work outside the ecclesiastic arena.

It’s never really easy being Catholic, but it’s usually the Church that makes it difficult. Protecting child abusers, but worried about nuns following the Sermon on the Mount? Do you really want me to leave? (I mean, yeah, probably you do.)

Andrea Gibson talks about committment.

50 years is a long time. If you name a facet of how you live your life– family, job, location, religion, community, school, beliefs– we are facing changes in them right now.  The year is ripe for things to develop. The only thing not likely to change in the next six months, the next year (the next 50 years), is our committment to each other.

My friend Dove shared this YouTube video with me. Andrea Gibson is a relatively famous spoken word poet. “I Do”:

The middle of the story.

April 3rd 2009 was a Friday. Lindsey and I were in our apartment in Panyu, a suburb of megalopolis Guangzhou, China. The results of Varnum v. Brien hadn’t broken by the time we went to bed. We had to get up early the next morning; we were going to Hong Kong.

As soon as I got up Saturday morning, I checked the internet. “Lindsey!” I called out. She came into the room really quickly, because the tone of my voice made it sound as though I had hurt myself or discovered some horrible news. “What?!” “We can get married in Iowa.”

The Iowa Supreme Court had ruled, “We are firmly convinced the exclusion of gay and lesbian people from the institution of civil marriage does not substantially further any important governmental objective… Iowa Code section 595.2 [defining marriage as male-female only] denies gay and lesbian people the equal protection of the law promised by the Iowa Constitution.”

This is perhaps not the most romantic engagement story you’ve ever heard.

Don’t worry, we have other engagement stories. We’ve been getting engaged since at least 2006. We didn’t really expect to be able to get married so soon. But that’s one more thing: we don’t necessarily get to the pick the time and place we’d like to be married. The earliest possible challenge to the Court ruling is 2012. Iowa, fortunately, is where we fell in love and a place we hold dearly. 2011, fortunately, is a good amount of time away for us to be thinking about getting married (and conveniently a year and a half after Lindsey’s brother’s wedding and a year after my sister’s wedding). We are fortunate to be in love and young in a time of change. Iowa is just a small answer to the question “Why can’t we get married?”, but I’m so happy it’s Iowa.

It’s a beautiful spring day today.

You can read the Iowa Supreme Court ruling here. I highly recommend it.